INT. JACOBS APARTMENT - DAY

ROB, the somewhat average college male brusts into JACOBS
apartment.

                    ROB
          Oh my god. Oh my god.

JACOB comes out to the front room to see who has just barged
into his domain.

                    JACOB
          The heck Rob! I could have had a
          girl in here.

Rob just looks for a minute.

                    ROB
          There are more important things
          going on Jake. Like things that
          exist.

                    JACOB
          Get out.

                    ROB
          There's no place to go.

                    JACOB
          You've got your apartment. So ge..

                    ROB
          Not that. I got no where! don't you
          understand!

                    JACOB
          The heck are you yapping about?

                    ROB
          It's that Mexican place.

                    JACOB
          Rios?

                    ROB
          No. Enrique's

                    JACOB
          Oh, so..

                    ROB
          I'm out. They kicked me out! I'm a
          wreak. I'm shaking. I can't see
          clearly.

                    JACOB
          Your sober.

                    ROB
          Jake, this is it. There is no more.

                    JACOB
          What are you so worked up over man
          you've gotten thrown out of places
          before. ... many times.

ROB sets down heavily on the couch.

                    ROB
          It's over man.

Face in hands.

                    JACOB
          What? What is?

                    ROB
          No more food.

                    JACOB
          ...  you don't like Mexican that
          much. ...

Rob just sits and stares off into the distance.

                    JACOB
          Wait a minute. ... Are you
          saying... this is...

                    ROB
          I'm going to Starve!

                    JACOB
          Your not going to starve. There's
          that Italian place.

                    ROB
          Not since last week when I went out
          with the manager's daughter.

                    JACOB
          There's that pizza place.

                    ROB
          Nope.

                    JACOB
          The Deli?

                    ROB
          East or West?

                    JACOB
          East.

                    ROB
          No.

                    JACOB
          West.

                    ROB
          Nope.

                    JACOB
          What about Clack in the Jacks?

                    ROB
          Please, I haven't been able to go
          back there since freshmen year and
          that football team incident.

                    JACOB
          ... that was pretty bad... I was
          amazed that you stayed in the town.

                    ROB
          Gah. Don't remind me.

                    JACOB
          Chinese

                    ROB
               (stares)
          ...

                    JACOB
          No Chinese? There are like 5 of
          those in this town!

                    ROB
          Yeah and did you know all of them
          had new 24 hour surveillance
          systems installed...

                    JACOB
          The hell did you do Rob!

                    ROB
          I can't help it. I can't help that
          I can never understand the waiters.
          I can't help the fact my sound
          system got stuck on max. I can't
          help the fact my girlfriend smelled
          so strongly of cheese.

                    JACOB
          Well there's always the grocery
          store.

                    ROB
          There... was the grocery store.

                    JACOB
          Not even... th... my god man.

The silence holds for a moment.

                    JACOB
          You 'are' going to starve.

                    ROB
          That's why you have to help me man.

                    JACOB
          You know this explains a lot. I was
          wondering why you were always
          getting Mexican. You don't even
          like Mexican.

                    ROB
          Yeah! Well it was food at least.

                    JACOB
          I can't believe this. I mean, I
          knew you got kicked out of a lot of
          places.. but I never thought it
          would come to this.

                    ROB
          I'm doomed.

                    JACOB
          That. Or you open your own
          restaurant.

                    ROB
          My own what-what?

                    JACOB
          Your own restaurant.

                    ROB
          I can't open a restaurant. I'd get
          kicked out.

                    JACOB
          Out of your own restaurant? That's
          crazy.

                    ROB
          Hey man, I don't know if you've
          noticed but the whole dining
          industry has it out for me.

                    JACOB
          But it's your...

                    ROB
          I don't know. It would just happen
          I'm sure of it.